Hello to anyone that is reading this ❤
As the title of this posts states, the subjects and harmful disorders I’m going to break down before sharing some resources, I have great familiarity with.
Finding yourself in an emotionally abusive relationship or situation, and with a narcissist at that, is devastating because you can’t help but wonder how you got there. I had those same thoughts. The fact that you’re reading this means that you are seeking help. I believe that no one searches the topics narcissism and emotional abusive unless they are experiencing it. At least that’s how it was with me. I had heard the terms and pitied such situations, but once it happened to me, I began to look further into this disgusting phenomenon and its horrible inhabitants. It was upsetting and embarrassing to see how so many examples listed. Like they were taken right out of my life. One one hand I felt validated that I was right. On the other hand, struck that I had tolerated such maltreatment and from the very people that claim to love me. They were the ones hurting me.
Again, I’ve asked myself, often in tears and a tear-stained journal, how did I end up here? That question will burn as much as the pain inflicted upon you. But I implore, in between those possible tears, do not beat yourself up. The fact that you’re still reading this and researching is a humble giant baby step towards getting out and healing. You know that this isn’t love. You’ve seen the positive affirmations and reminder memes on social media. Love doesn’t hurt or make you cry (out of sadness). It just doesn’t. And you know this! You’ve been knowing this. So why is it we’ve carried on turning our backs on knowing better?
We also know the answer to this.
More often than not, the emotional abuser and narcissist is unfortunately someone we love romantically, are attracted to, or in some cases, familial, such as a parent or parents. We’ve dealt with their sorry excuses for human beings because of those ties, soul or familial. We stuck around with fraught hope that they will change one day for better and for good. What’s worse is that sometimes they’ve capable of fooling us for days in a row of good behavior, making us believe that we’re getting somewhere with them. But no. The hard truth is that they haven’t changed. And scarily, never will. They were behaving good because they are getting what they wanted from us, and the outside world for the time being. Remember, their kindness is not genuine. There’s always an agenda because then out of nowhere, to us, we’re reminded of their wicked ways. Hurtful comments. A damning accusation. Your expressed feelings dismissed. Control tactics. GASLIGHTING. Overall disrespect rearing its ugly head. It’s a bizarre cycle that will leave you blindsided every time. And the perpetuators are aware and do not care what they are doing to you. I’m writing like this because for victims and survivors of emotional abuse and narcissism, acknowledging this reality will keep you from further harm. I want each and every one of you still reading this to let go of those trauma bonds and unhealthy soul ties. You deserve better.
(And honestly, it’s beyond time that narcissism gets diagnosed as a public health crisis).
There is a lot to take in on these subjects, and below are videos and an article that I hope will make you feel seen, heard, and begin the journey of healing and valuing yourself more. They have helped me. Also, reach out to family, friends, whoever you truly trust and has proven to be a real one and talk about what you’re going through. As well as hotlines for abuse.
I’m also going to share social media pages, from Instagram, that encourage self-love, bravery, and deliver positive affirmations.
I also wanna state this: watching these videos back to back may be a lot. Whether you’re currently dealing with a narcissist or experiencing emotional abuse, or it’s just triggering, feel free to watch one or two and then come back later to watch another. This post will still be here.
Please be safe, start to smarten up, speak even if your voice shakes, don’t let loneliness be the guide, and begin your healing. You’re already light years ahead of those that have hurt you in working on your emotional and mental health.
It won’t be easy and you will have a relapse or two because of who is hurting you. Just keep researching, remember it all, and stay alert. Those flags are bright, vibrant RED for a reason.
ARTICLE from Mind Body Green: Why You’re Attracting Narcissists & 6 Ways To Stop (mindbodygreen.com)
FOLLOW THESE ACCOUNTS ON INSTAGRAM:
- Quotes by Christie (@quotesbychristie) • Instagram photos and videos
- Female Collective (@femalecollective) • Instagram photos and videos
- We’re Not Really Strangers (@werenotreallystrangers) • Instagram photos and videos
- The Happy Snapshot (@thehappysnapshot) • Instagram photos and videos
- Unbothered (@r29unbothered) • Instagram photos and videos