Men, or boys of men, really have some nerve.

Ladies, we’ve probably all heard it before, or at least at some point these common complaints: “You never dress sexy for me…anymore”.”You should be wearing some sexy underwear for me”. “You never do anything sexy for me”. Oh, really? You know, it’s so funny that occasionally this topic comes into play because I’m sure for too many of us we can’t recall the last time these neanderthals need something romantic and sexy for us and DID NOT bring it back as bait in an argument later. For some of you, hey, maybe you can remember, but I hope you can still sympathize with the those that are finding themselves edged between wanting to be their significant other’s before anybody else and their independent woman values.

Of course there’s nothing wrong with keeping it mind that in love and war, it’s alright to let love win, but how irritating is it when suddenly dressing up for your relationship becomes a chore or requirement. And yes, maybe as very close wavelengths, there is an undercurrent of sexism in such requests said in pathetic despair that makes a woman want to do nothing more than punish the so called Man some more.

Even as I finished that last statement though, I’ll be honest, I get it. I suppose for woman not taking taking the thoughtful steps of initiating sexy-time with their paramour is the equivalent of when those sweet and spontaneous lunches and dinners on the town slowly become infrequent and regulated to holidays and then, there still might a battle. It’s a classic case of the battles of the sexes, and while sometimes the MAN has a point, what exactly has he done lately to encourage lacy boy-shorts. If at all, I’m challenging this age old pendulum of man vs. woman in the sartorial department: bedtime edition. What exactly do young men and older men do in keeping it hot? Yeah, you look cute in your Jordans, but give me something else that doesn’t remind of the thirteen year old boy in the street. How about you wear a suit and tie, or even a blazer with those jeans just because for a change? Maybe you can get the candles and already have them lit next time? Point blank period, when was the last time, YOU did something sexy and I had no idea?

Too many individuals of the male species always do this to us: making us feel bad about caring less sometimes about something other than their pleasure principles. And how hetero-normative is this subject? Do all types of couples go through this? Trying to keep the sexy? It’s a reality as far as its rearing its aloof head, and while waiting for Valentine’s Day is the most obvious answer to this showdown, where is the common ground? Should women really have to apologize for something that easily be fixed with a shower or til the next day? When trying to get point A to point B, sometimes the last thing we’re thinking about is if our undies are Kiki De Montparnasse approved (and of course we secretly wish they were. We just might wear that thong because it’s black velvet with red creme bow ties).

So fellas, we get it. Sometimes you want to relinquish those honeymoon feelings for ol’ serendipity sake, but give us a break on this alright? Both sides need to play nice and we look great regularly otherwise. You’re not the only one trying to rule the world.

-CSJ